Tongue Twister: Esau Wood

This is an expansion on a tongue twister I first read at wikipedia: esau wood. I liked it, so I expanded it significantly. Here’s the current version:

 

Esau Wood sawed wood. 

 

Esau Wood would saw wood. 

 

All the wood Esau Wood saw, Esau Wood would saw. 

 

In other words, all the wood Esau saw to saw, Esau sought to saw. 

 

Oh, the wood Wood would saw! 

 

And, oh the wood-saw with which Wood would saw wood! 

 

But one day, Wood’s wood-saw would saw no wood, and thus the wood Wood sawed was not the wood Wood would saw if Wood’s wood-saw would saw wood. 

 

Now, Wood would saw wood with a wood-saw that would saw wood, so Esau sought a saw that would saw wood. 

 

One day, Esau saw a saw saw wood as no other wood-saw Wood saw would saw wood. 

 

In fact, of all the wood-saws Wood ever saw saw wood, Wood never saw a wood-saw that would saw wood as the wood-saw Wood saw saw wood would saw wood.

 

So Esau bought the saw he saught, and I never saw a wood-saw that would saw wood as the wood-saw Wood saw saw wood would saw until I saw Esau Wood saw wood with the wood-saw Wood saw saw wood. 

 

Now Wood saws wood with the wood-saw Wood saw saw wood.

 

 

 

Esau Wood lives in the woods. 

 

After all, Esau needs wood to saw. 

 

The locals think they have a sense of humor, so they call those woods Wood’s woods.

 

So Esau Wood saws Wood’s woods wood, and Esau’s wood saw would saw Wood’s woods wood, but Esau’s wood saw would not saw Wood’s woods wood knots.

 

Why not?

 

Because Esau Wood’s wood saw was not a knot saw, and while a knot saw would saw wood knots, Wood’s wood saw, not a knot saw, would not saw wood knots.

 

So Esau Wood sought a knot saw.

 

 

 

In the next village was a man named Ward Cunningham, known as Ward C. for short.

 

Ward C. made a saw set, with a wood saw that would saw wood, and a knot saw that would saw wood knots.

 

Esau Wood saw Ward C.’s saw set saw wood knots, and wood. 

 

Now, Esau Wood sought a knot saw and a wood saw not, but once Wood saw Ward C.’s saw set’s wood saw saw wood and Ward C.’s saw set’s knot saw saw knots, Wood saw that Ward C.’s saw set was what he sought to saw wood and wood knots in Wood’s Woods.

 

Esau said, “See, Ward C., I would saw wood knots in Wood’s Woods woods, so I sought one knot saw not two saws.

 

“But I saw your saw set wood saw saw wood and knot saw saw wood knots and now I see naught but a Ward C. saw set will do.

 

“Your saw set, I see, would saw Wood’s Woods wood knots with the wood knot saw I saw, and would saw Wood’s Woods wood with the wood saw I saw.

 

 Ward C. said, “Why would you saw wood knots?”

 

Esau Wood replied, “I’m building a see-saw. For the kids.”

 

 Ward C. smiled and said, “So, you seek to saw Wood’s Woods wood to make a see-saw. 

 

 

 

“But when you saw your wood saw would not saw your see-saw wood, you sought a wood knot saw that would saw your see-saw wood.”

 

“Exactly,” Esau agreed. “I sought to saw see-saw wood, but you see, Ward C., my see-saw wood would not saw, because my wood saw would saw Wood’s Wood wood, but would not saw Wood’s Woods wood knots.

 

“So I sought to see your Syd C. knot saw saw knot wood so I could saw see-saw wood from Wood’s Woods wood and Wood’s Woods wood knots.

 

“But now I see your saw set saw sets of knot and not knot wood, and I see a Ward C. saw set would saw see saw wood.”

 

“I see,” said Ward C. “I have a question. If I were to saw a see saw, Wood’s Woods wood would do, but would not Wood’s Woods knot wood not?”

 

Now Esau smiled. “The see-saw wood I sought to saw was Wood’s Woods wood, not Wood’s Woods knot wood.

 

“I would not see see-saw wood sawn from knot wood, but not-knot wood.

 

“Wood, in other words.

 

“But the wood in Wood’s Woods wood is wood and knot wood together.

 

“I cannot saw wood if I cannot saw knot wood.

 

 

 

“I would saw wood, but I must saw wood knots or I could not saw wood.”

 

 

 

So, to sum up: Esau Wood sought to saw see-saw wood from Wood’s Woods wood, but Wood’s Woods wood had wood knots. 

 

Esau Wood would not see knot wood in see-saw wood, so Esau sought to saw Wood’s Woods wood, but not Wood’s Woods knots, but Esau saw he could not saw wood and not saw wood knots.

 

Wood’s wood saw would saw Wood’s Woods wood, but would saw Wood’s Woods knot wood not, so Wood sought a knot saw that would saw a wood knot.

 

Ward C.’s saw set knot saw would saw wood knots, and Ward C.’s saw set wood saw would saw wood, but Esau’s wood saw would saw wood too, so Esau sought Ward C.’s saw set wood saw not, but the knot saw to saw see-saw wood.

 

 

 

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